Adjusting Pressure

As I am a woman who is led by my emotions,

I can only assume that you are one of the same kind.

But where I reveal my sorrow in words,

you keep yours close to your heart, close to yourself,

closed, locked, kept safe within you.

Little pieces of pain that are better freed,

merely to get rid of but you keep in

as if you took pleasure in the torture that they cause.

Maybe you have been mislead to believe

that you are meant to suffer in silence.

The closest that I can get to your misery

is by the touch of your tears

after they gather in the corner of your eyes

to then slowly roll down your cheeks for me to wipe off.

I know my tears taste salty and

I have the feeling that yours must be bitter.

Bitter drops of relieved agony,

better not caged within your body

for they would ignite your insides.

Therefore do not envy the ones who cannot cry

as they are burning quietly.

I would not care if your tears burned my fingers as I wipe them off,

for I rather have my fingers hurt than your face scarred by them.

I need you to know that time does not heal all wounds,

do not be fooled,

for I know that this is nothing but a myth,

a make-believe.

Do not waste your precious time waiting for salvation.

I wished I could teach you how to use your voice

to adjust the pressure within you,

so that you could take this massive load of your soul

and be free like you crave to.

'The heart is never neutral' (from the film Shanghai)

This is so true.. No matter what we try for our mind to let us believe, the heart will always speak the truth.. But unfortunately it is the mind that deals with circumstances, it is the mind that keeps us sane.. The heart, no matter how true it is, cannot deal with life's issues like loss, freedom, passion, reality, dreams.. This alone is for the mind to deal with and the heart does not have any say in it.. And the sentence 'follow your heart' becomes an impossible task because if we did, we would cross the line to insanity..

Irrationality's merely the cause of feelings being unleashed..

I can only be passionate when faced with passion..

Naked Cravings

You stood me up while I was naked. Left me with your fingerprints all over my body, the memory of your kiss on my lips, the sweet juice of excitement between my legs, craving for more. Craving you.
I'm still naked although dressed. I'm still exposed although covered with my duvet. I'm still wet although alone. I'm still craving for more. Craving you.

You stood me up while I was naked. Said you had to run. Stole my last kisses in a haste. Left me with more fingerprints that now burn my skin. I love this burning sensation. I want more. I want you.
Play Connect the Dots on my body to burn me some more. Burn my breasts, my back, my hips, my thighs, my clit, my lips. Burn me inside out.

You stood me up while I was naked. You left me with an experience that now seems impossible to cover up with clothes, wash off with a shower, wipe out with a night's sleep. When you left, you left me naked.
You took the clothes that could cover me, the water that could shower me, the dreams that could have wiped out this memory that begs and craves for more. Craves for you.

'I miss you so bad' you said. I shall peel my skin off slowly, carefully, for you to keep. Take the fingerprints, take the burns, take the craving. Feel my nakedness on your fingertips and burn yourself.
My skin will grow back, fresh, young and smooth. Without marks. Without burns. Without prints. Without memory. Without the feeling of nakedness and exposure. But until then I'll still be craving for more. Craving you.

In Solitude

In solitude is where I find myself every day anew.. I wake up to myself, in my universe of thoughts.. My eyes capture pictures, images of places, streets, buildings, the endless sky and nature.. I’m a voyeur to my surroundings.. In my mind everything and everyone I see has a story to tell, although unknown to me but somehow written all over them..

In solitude my ears are pleasured by the sounds of life.. Colourful noises remind me that I am alive.. I have the freedom to choose whether I want the sweet sound of music to lift me up, sweep me off my feet and carry me wherever it will or whether I want to tune in to life itself and be met by random beats that this city has to offer..

In solitude I am free.. Free to feel, read my own emotions, interpret my mood, my actions and my reactions with explanations a spoken word could not describe.. In solitude I have met myself many times all over again for the first time and for this reason know myself better now than I claim to know anything at all.. In solitude I am aware of who I am..

In solitude I experience more than I could ever share with anyone and the excitement I feel inside belongs to me and no one else.. I would not dare to explain my discoveries to someone who does not own my eyes, my ears or my heart as only they have seen, heard and felt the truth at first hand.. For no one else shall have the power for my findings to be altered into a translation that suits their own persona..

In solitude I am as content as I am when I share precious moments with people who are dear to me.. Laughter, happiness and even pain are best shared, shared with the ones you love and trust as togetherness is the sweetener of life..

While I walk in solitude, at times accompanied by my dearest ones, strangers and random followers, I shall never forget love as in solitude I will remain until it will find its way back to me..

Just Another One

You think you’ve scored, you pat yourself on your shoulders, you even get people's approving nod and wink.. Have you not realised that I’m no trophy and that you haven’t won a prize? It’s merely a short term allowance for you to see what I refuse for others to look at, to touch what others crave to feel.. I’m the one in charge, I’m the one who gives permission or who denies access..

And you, you’re just another one, nothing special, whether you’re gorgeous is none important nor is your job title, the money in your bank account or anything else that you may call an achievement.. You’ve been chosen by me like a toy off the shelf, you’ve been chosen to please me, entertain me, excite me and satisfy me.. There’s something about you that must have woken my curiosity, something that made me want to feel your touch, your strength, your aggression or maybe you’re just here to boost my ego..

And if you perform exactly as how I imagined you would, I will want more, I will exhaust you, there won’t be any limits until you bore me.. But as much pleasure as you may gain from this experience, you’re still just another one as the pleasure I get from it, is way more important than you’ll ever be..

(If I'm just a challenge, then you're 'Just Another One')