Love can only be described with poetry.

Science explains the chemical reactions in your body which we then call love.

Religions / Societies have created templates to how relationships are supposed to evolve.

Heartbreak is when the above mentioned system clashes.

When have you learned so much about love that you don't feel like you can love any more without being repulsed by the mere thought of it?

The Fear Of Love

In the end, we are all just looking to be loved and to love unconditionally with our hearts wide open, bare and safe in someone else's possession. It is the mere fear that holds us back and has us build up a front for this precious treasure called heart not to be ruined by someone else who, like ourselves, is just as scared to break it or have it broken.

We are hardened by our reputation, like a war hero scaring the enemy, not to make her our enemy but to proof to her and ourselves that we may not be defeated. That we protect what breaks us most without admitting our weakness. Like a dog that barks but dares not to bite for it only is scared.

It is not only the fear that has us shield our own treasure but also the fear that we might not be suited guardians of someone else's heart. It is an enormous responsibility that we have not asked for or maybe we did ask for it by mistake. Misguided by curiosity and irrationality, tasting the forbidden fruit. But one will not dare to hold on to someone else's heart if one does not have the will and guts to take care of it. One has no choice but to break it, like ripping off a plaster fast, as neglecting it is only the cruel escape. Breaking someone's heart must be like cutting a baby's throat with a bread knife but the baby survives just like your last sweetheart did. The scar will be left on her heart and not on her throat, invisible, but still with the memory of the sharp knife-like pain.

The fear of love, the fear to break or to be broken, can leave us lonely and confused, maybe frustrated at times. It is education that makes us wise but who is going to teach us love but ourselves? So we are left with experience. We have to burn our fingers for us to know that fire will burn us. We therefore have no choice but to give our hearts away and we will have to take on the responsibility to look after someone else's heart. We will have to break and we will have to be broken, so that one day we will trust someone enough to take care of our heart and we will be ready to be the carer of theirs.

I tend to contradict myself when my emotions take over while my mind stands still.

If love makes me selfish, then I do not want to ever love again, for freedom is all I desire for my beloved one. But if the same knowledge is the prevention of selfishness and honesty enables mutual understanding but not the renunciation of freedom, then I shall love with all my heart.

It has got to be someone's mind you fall in love with most because there is no peaceful future in constant disagreement..

'The heart is never neutral' (from the film Shanghai)

This is so true.. No matter what we try for our mind to let us believe, the heart will always speak the truth.. But unfortunately it is the mind that deals with circumstances, it is the mind that keeps us sane.. The heart, no matter how true it is, cannot deal with life's issues like loss, freedom, passion, reality, dreams.. This alone is for the mind to deal with and the heart does not have any say in it.. And the sentence 'follow your heart' becomes an impossible task because if we did, we would cross the line to insanity..

Irrationality's merely the cause of feelings being unleashed..

I can only be passionate when faced with passion..

In Solitude

In solitude is where I find myself every day anew.. I wake up to myself, in my universe of thoughts.. My eyes capture pictures, images of places, streets, buildings, the endless sky and nature.. I’m a voyeur to my surroundings.. In my mind everything and everyone I see has a story to tell, although unknown to me but somehow written all over them..

In solitude my ears are pleasured by the sounds of life.. Colourful noises remind me that I am alive.. I have the freedom to choose whether I want the sweet sound of music to lift me up, sweep me off my feet and carry me wherever it will or whether I want to tune in to life itself and be met by random beats that this city has to offer..

In solitude I am free.. Free to feel, read my own emotions, interpret my mood, my actions and my reactions with explanations a spoken word could not describe.. In solitude I have met myself many times all over again for the first time and for this reason know myself better now than I claim to know anything at all.. In solitude I am aware of who I am..

In solitude I experience more than I could ever share with anyone and the excitement I feel inside belongs to me and no one else.. I would not dare to explain my discoveries to someone who does not own my eyes, my ears or my heart as only they have seen, heard and felt the truth at first hand.. For no one else shall have the power for my findings to be altered into a translation that suits their own persona..

In solitude I am as content as I am when I share precious moments with people who are dear to me.. Laughter, happiness and even pain are best shared, shared with the ones you love and trust as togetherness is the sweetener of life..

While I walk in solitude, at times accompanied by my dearest ones, strangers and random followers, I shall never forget love as in solitude I will remain until it will find its way back to me..

Just Another One

You think you’ve scored, you pat yourself on your shoulders, you even get people's approving nod and wink.. Have you not realised that I’m no trophy and that you haven’t won a prize? It’s merely a short term allowance for you to see what I refuse for others to look at, to touch what others crave to feel.. I’m the one in charge, I’m the one who gives permission or who denies access..

And you, you’re just another one, nothing special, whether you’re gorgeous is none important nor is your job title, the money in your bank account or anything else that you may call an achievement.. You’ve been chosen by me like a toy off the shelf, you’ve been chosen to please me, entertain me, excite me and satisfy me.. There’s something about you that must have woken my curiosity, something that made me want to feel your touch, your strength, your aggression or maybe you’re just here to boost my ego..

And if you perform exactly as how I imagined you would, I will want more, I will exhaust you, there won’t be any limits until you bore me.. But as much pleasure as you may gain from this experience, you’re still just another one as the pleasure I get from it, is way more important than you’ll ever be..

(If I'm just a challenge, then you're 'Just Another One')

A kiss needs to go through my entire body, it has to electrify me, it has to get me to crave for more, it has to be spontaneous and whether it is gentle or filled with lust, it most importantly has to be passionate.. It's all about passion, everything is..

The Animal Within

I'm a cat and I like to stray, I like to be adored, I'll let you pet me if I feel like it but I might scratch your face if you make a wrong move.. It's just for protection you see, I don't mean any harm by it..

I catch mice because they're cute but tend to be naïve enough not to realise that I'll eat them alive.. I never mean to though but I'm a cat you see, it's what we do..

I'm a cat but I fall for dogs, they excite me.. Their never ending enthusiasm attracts me.. Dogs though, not very classy creatures, bark too much, chase their own tail but gosh they take my fancy.. But you know what they say about cats and dogs don't you?! I know too well as I got bitten too many times..

What can I tell you? I'm a cat and I like to stray... I've come across mice, I've come across dogs.. I've consumed and I've been consumed.. For all I know, I ought to stay away from both..

If I'm lucky I might meet another cat but cats you see are rare to find.. Elegant creatures, witty but so quite and gentle on their paws that you may not even realise that you are in their presence.. Even if you catch a glance in the corner of your eyes you may only catch their shadow..

Cats are clever, so don't try to lure us, we don't fall for whatever you have to offer as we take pride in our independency..
It's trust we seek, truth we want, kindness we desire and if you gain our heart we may stay for good..

Love

Life throws all sorts of shit at us but at the same time there’s no situation that wouldn’t provide us with a solution.

Love however is a subject that we humans seem to struggle with, a lot!

When we don’t have it, we crave it.

When we do have it, we question it.

And when we loose it, it hurts so much that we can physically feel it.

No matter how power hungry or distracted we may seem,

love is always the one thing that will control us more than we can ever imagine to control anything.



Independent Woman

Keep me company, just for a little while..

Wrap your body around mine so that I feel like I belong for a moment..

Make my adrenaline hit the roof to let me feel happiness in the dark hour of the night..

Then leave quietly in the morning so that I can be the independent woman that I am..

My mojo isn't broken.. Its expectation is just much higher than what's available..

Don't be in love with the sweet imagination of what could be.. Instead, be in love with reality, with the here and now, with what is and what in fact isn't..